Links: Living a Life of Modesty

Disclaimer: Each of us are at a different place in our walk with the Lord. Just because a site has a certain article of clothing or an article mentions a specific about modesty doesn't mean I endorse it one way or the other. These are just listed as helps to you as you strive to find God's will for you in regards to modesty. 

Modest Clothing Sites:

The Modest Mom
Style J Denim Skirts
Modest Clothes Directory
Hannah Lise
Dressing For His Glory

Must-Read Articles: 

Learning to Dress Modestly @ The Modest Mom Blog
Tell Her Mama! @ Raising Homemakers
Modest Dress: The Heart of the Issue @ Large Families on Purpose
She Wears Skirts Series @ Raising Arrows
God Given Protection for Women @ Joy Ever After (yes, shameless plug! ;-)

Simple Woman's Daybook

For more Simple Woman's Daybook go here.

FOR TODAY: 

Outside my window...it's dark.

I am thinking...a lot of scattered things.

I am thankful for...God's grace toward me in my failings.

From the learning rooms...the school schedule is made, the first grade books are all set up--we're just waiting for the fourth grade books to arrive.

From the kitchen...we never thought allergen-free cooking could be so good. Really enjoying all the meals!

I am wearing...my polka dot skirt and red shirt.

I am creating...some new blog ideas.

I am going...just got home from a girl's night out with my mom and daughter.

I am reading...Finding Your Purpose as a Mom by Donna Otto.

I am hoping...Joey's not getting an ear infection.

I am hearing...nothing but my keys typing (or rather my typing on the keys).

Around the house...I've been doing some weeding out and organizing, but it doesn't show much yet!

One of my favorite things...quiet time alone (Oops! Did I just say that?)

A few plans for the rest of the week: some company and getting things in order....maybe go out to eat.

Here is picture for thought I am sharing...

 

No where else I'd rather be!

Troubleshooting Modesty

I'm the type of person that likes step-by-step lists when I'm learning to do something new. Unfortunately, this is rare in the spiritual realm where we are called to "walk in the Spirit". Each person's walk is unique and individual and there aren't any "one size fits all" strategies. However, when it comes to dressing ourselves modestly, I think this may offer some practical help. I'm sure you have much more to add. Feel free to do so in the comments!

Common Problems in Dressing Modestly:

1. I don't know what is modest.
Although I've heard men complain that we women "know what we're doing" when we dress inappropriately, I don't believe this is always the case. (It is sometimes, so honestly search your heart before God and have Him check your motives.) Sometimes we really don't know how our clothing affects men around us because they are so different than us. I think God has built a protection around us in three forms. Every woman should have at least one of these resources available and some of us have all three. If you are a single woman, ask your father. A father usually has your best interest in mind. If you are a married woman, ask your husband. He has a double interest involved: he loves you and he doesn't want other men attracted to you in the wrong way! If neither of these are available to you, ask a godly, older woman in your church. Choose one who exhibits modesty herself and truly has a heart for the Lord. On top of these people, first and foremost, pray, search the Word and see what God has to say to you personally.


2. I don't want to look frumpy and outdated.
Some have given modesty a bad connotation by defining it in this way, but I believe modest clothing can be stylish. I don't think Christian women should follow fads, nor do I think they should look to the fashion industry to plan their wardrobes for them. However, modest clothing can be beautiful, functional and up-to-date.


3. I can't afford to buy a new wardrobe.
This can be a concern if you are newly convicted about your current wardrobe being immodest. There are many things you can do. First of all, go through your closet and pull out items that are already modest. Surely you have a few! Then, look at the ones that aren't and see if you can do something to make them modest. For example, if a shirt is too low-cut or see-through, you could add a tank underneath to make it modest. Lastly, periodically look for new items that go with what you have that you can afford. Don't be afraid to look at thrift stores or discount stores. Modesty is important enough to invest in.


4. I can't find modest clothing anywhere.
I personally think this is an excuse. I'm sorry if that seems too harsh. If you needed water to live, you wouldn't sit around and whine and complain that you couldn't find any. You would search and do what you had to do to find it. Yes, modesty is that important to our spiritual life. Some of my favorite stores for modest clothing are Christopher and Banks and Dress Barn. If you can afford it, Ann Taylor and Coldwater Creek have nice things. I have found things even at WalMart or discount stores and especially at thrift stores. There are many online resources as well. Do a search for modest clothing. I'll include a few of my favorite web sites in the Link List on Saturday.


5. I don't want to be legalistic.
Legalism is doing extra-biblical things in order to get to Heaven. We are not being modest to earn our way into Heaven. We are endeavoring to be modest because we have Heaven within us and we want to represent it to a lost world. There is a serious disconnect between a woman who claims to love the Lord, yet is turning men away from Him by causing them to lust after her.
Our goal in being modest is to please the One Who gave His life for us. It's our love gift to Him.


6. I just don't think modesty is that important.
I've done my best to convince you that it is. I don't believe you can be a serious student of the Word and believe that modesty is not taught there. If one is not dedicated to pleasing the Lord, they won't see this as important. The specifics of modesty are between you and the Lord, but if you don't care about it at all, make sure you are truly a disciple of His.

Many blessings to you all!

Modest: More Than Clothes

When we think of the word modest, we automatically think of our clothing, but really how we dress is only one small part of modesty. The word modest is used once in the King James Version, and is defined by Strong's Concordance as  "orderly, decorous". To be honest, I wasn't sure what decorous meant exactly, so I looked it up on dictionary.com.

decorous: characterized by dignified propriety in conduct, manners, appearance, character, etc.

That covers a lot of ground! It has to do with our actions and who we are at our core as well as with our appearance. I'm sure we've all seen women in very modest apparel with attitudes that were flirtatious, complaining or characterized by some other undesirable character trait.



There is one other time in the King James Version where a word is used that has the same meaning as modest. It is in reference to the behavior of bishops and mentions nothing about their attire. So, be encouraged, the men aren't off the hook on this modesty thing!

My desire in encouraging us to live a life of modesty is to make sure every action is lined up with God's perfect will for us whether it be the action of dressing ourselves or of how we act.

Be encouraged today as you live a modest life before our Saviour!

 

.

Quick, Easy, Healthy: Desserts

Did you just do a double take? Can dessert be healthy? Yes. With a few disclaimers, of course. First of all, I don't believe that health is all about losing weight. I'd rather go for high nutrient than low fat, carb, etc. Just so you know where I'm coming from. Still, whether you are trying to lose weight or not, desserts should be treats not a regular part of every day. Or so I am learning...rather reluctantly.

My go-to dessert when I need something quick is Hot Fudge Pudding Cake. This is NOT low fat or even low sugar. It should not be eaten very often. I'm just saying....so you don't blame me for gaining 10 pounds on my recipe. ;-)

Hot Fudge Pudding Cake
1 1/4 c. sugar - divided
1 c. flour
7 T. cocoa, divided
2 t. baking powder
1/4 t. salt
1/2 c. milk
1/3 c. butter, melted
1 1/2 t. vanilla
1/2 c. packed light brown sugar
1 1/4 c. hot water (tap)

Heat oven to 350 degrees. In bowl, sift together 3/4 c. sugar, flour, 3 T. cocoa, baking powder and salt. Stir in milk, butter and vanilla. Beat until smooth. Pour batter into ungreased 8 or 9 inch square baking pan. Stir together remaining 1/2 c. sugar, brown sugar and remaining 4 T. cocoa. Sprinkle mixture evenly over batter. Pour hot water over top. DO NOT STIR! Bake 35-40 minutes or until center is almost set. Let stand 15 minutes. Spoon into dishes, spooning sauce on bottom to top.

I mix this up before dinner and let it cook while we're eating dinner. It is best served with whipped cream or ice cream (homemade is best, but if you're going for quick, you might have to cheat on that).

O.K. that's quick and easy. How to make it a little healthier? Use a natural sugar (I like evaporated cane juice). It's still sugar which is not healthy, but it is at least not bleached and processed as much. Use whole grain flour in place of all-purpose. Make sure your vanilla and cocoa don't have sugar in them---this recipe has enough!

If chocolate isn't your thing, here's a way to make your apple crisp much healthier:
How to Healthify Apple Crisp

Are We Sisters or Seducers?

My brother and I have always looked out for each other. He would probably tell you that I look out for him a little too much! When he was in kindergarten and forgot his lunch money, he would come and find me. When I was in junior high in the middle of a boy dilemma, I would go to him. He was my companion as I learned to drive and lived through my first accident with me and multiple wanderings when I got lost. Until my husband took over; he, along with my dad, acted as a protector for me.

In the first epistle Paul wrote to Timothy, he tells him how to conduct church family relationships:

Rebuke not an elder, but intreat him as a father; and the younger men as brethren;

The elder women as mothers; the younger as sisters, with all purity. (bold type mine)

I'm not sure how well the men are fulfilling their part, but as I look at the Christian community in general, I'm a little concerned with how we women are acting. It seems like a lot of us have forgotten to treat the men around us as if we were sisters and have decided to be their seducers instead.

Yes, I see those eye rolls...."here she goes again....I've heard it a million times....modesty". And we say that word with disdain. Why? Why is modesty such a despised word? Why would we want to be a temptation to our brothers in Christ and bait to a world of lost men? Why would we want to showcase our bodies therefore detracting from the light of Jesus to a lost world around us? What motive could we possibly have for showing too much skin, wearing clothes that are too form-fitting or acting in ways that attract men other than our husbands?

In a proper brother/sister relationship, each party looks out for the other. My brother knows where I am weak, and he takes up the slack. I try to do the same for him. In general, I don't see that among my Christian sisters. We may compete with our brothers in Christ or belittle them, but we don't take an extra moment to think as we dress in the morning, "Is this outfit going to make me a source of temptation for one of my brothers?"

When my brother came to me in kindergarten with trembling chin, asking for some lunch money so he could buy a sandwich, do you think I turned my back and said, "That's your problem! You shouldn't have forgotten yours! I want to use my money the way I want to use it." No, I was happy to share what I had because we were family. Because I loved him.

Is it too much to ask, dear sister, for you to love your Christian brothers with the love of Christ? To dress in a way that makes them comfortable to be around you and converse with you without fear of temptation. To act in a way that makes them identify with you as a sister and nothing else?

Yes, he's responsible for his own thoughts and actions, but to commit adultery it takes two.  Jesus said in Matthew 5:28: 

But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. (emphasis mine)

In Jesus' eyes, if a man lusts after you because of your own indiscretion, you are his partner in adultery.

Consider your husband---present or future. Preserve your purity, and as much as lies within you, the purity of your Christian brother ---present or future. Let's dress in a way that shows we are sisters....not seducers.

Links: Teaching Children to Work

Age Appropriate Chores for Kids @ The Happy Housewife

For Thy Sake: Teaching Children to Value Family Work (a series) @ Frantically Simple

Teaching Children Diligence @ Raising Olives

Resources for Chores, Household Management and More @ Positive Parenting

Online Chore Chart @ My Job Chart


Kids Can Have Fun Cleaning! @ I Dream of Clean

Simple Woman's Daybook

For more Simple Woman's Daybook go here.

FOR TODAY: 

Outside my window...it's dark and late at night. 

(Yes, I know said that last week, but that's the time I usually get to blog!

I am thinking...about school starting in 5 weeks.

I am thankful for...my mom that helps out with my kids (and a dozen other things!) so much.

From the learning rooms...not near enough! Hoping to brush up on a few things before school "officially" starts.

From the kitchen...we all tried quinoa (keen-wa) for the first time and loved it. Even picky Jerrod and baby Joey!

I am wearing...a red shirt and black skirt.

I am creating...our homeschool schedule.

I am going...nowhere except to bed shortly.

I am reading...Dwelling...still.

I am hoping...to get some deep cleaning done before school starts.

I am hearing...nothing...only quiet.

Around the house...are too many piles. Time for a revamping and organization. Cue the groans from my resident pack rats.

One of my favorite things...cuddling on the couch while reading a book to my kids.

A few plans for the rest of the week: nothing major except maybe a date night.

Here is picture for thought I am sharing...

In Memory....we've since added a child and subtracted a bike!

How to Make Work a Fun Learning Experience for Kids

I won't kid you (no pun intended)...work is not always fun. But you already knew that! Your children will soon figure that out, too. And that's o.k. There is merit to doing things we don't necessarily like to do. Life is full of those jobs! (I have yet to find out how to enjoy cleaning up after sick children.) We can't let our kids stop a job just because they are no longer enjoying it! However, here are some ways we try to make things a bit more enjoyable in our home....and teach them something at the same time:

9-month-old
 --Empty the dryer into a laundry basket with me. Slightly more helpful than emptying clean laundry from the basket all over the floor.
--Put toys back when done playing. I haven't mastered this with this child yet because frankly, I'm often busy and I have an older child do it. My other children enjoyed this and we would clap when they successfully got a block or toy in the basket.
--Work on outlet training while I'm cooking. He sits beside me on the counter and gets curious about outlets. After sitting there and hearing my "Ah!" when he tries to touch it, he avoids them now. (Not exactly work, but something he needs to learn, nonetheless.)
--Take him with me as I do other chores and let him watch. Never know how much he is absorbing for later on.

2-year-old
--Match socks together. This is a good way to work on colors, sizes, and matching sets.
--Play sock basketball. After the socks are all matched, we toss them into drawers and cheer when someone makes a "basket". Big brother likes to join in on this, too.
--Puts away silverware. This has been a good way for him to learn what a fork is versus a spoon. He used to use the names interchangeably. He can also distinguish between big and small forks most of the time. 
--"Helps" me cook. He loves to mix scrambled eggs or watch as I cook. I give him little jobs, and he thinks that he's "big stuff".


5-year-old
--Taking dirty laundry to our basement laundry room. He loves to show me how strong he is by toting the "heavy" basket down the stairs. Strength training!
--Putting things away. He actually surprised me the other day by voluntarily folding each pair of his underwear and organizing them in his drawer. If you knew my impulsive son, you would be greatly impressed by this progress!
--Loading the dishwasher. He is getting much better with this since I told him dumping dishes wasn't acceptable. He does his work quickly most of the time so he can get on to the next activity.
--Emptying the trash from the upstairs rooms into the kitchen trash.This is another job where he can show his "strength". An unexpected learning experience from this was he learned to tie a knot when he tied off the tops of the trash bags.
--Peels potatoes. Since I use potato peelers, my kids have learned to peel potatoes pretty young. My son still thinks it's fun, since it's kind of like using a knife.

9-year-old
--She loads the washer and the dryer for me and brings up the clean laundry and occasionally folds. Not sure how much fun she has with this, but she likes to pretend like she's a "laundress" in a grand hotel or bed and breakfast so it at least goes quickly. You can't argue she isn't learning valuable life lessons!
--She unloads dishwasher and cleans most of the bathroom. At this age, it's difficult to make fun games out of chores, but she does have a big imagination and makes her own game.
--Helps chop veggies and make a few simple things like scrambled eggs and baked goods. She even did a pot roast in the crock pot all by herself once since it mostly requires chopping and tossing things in. This is something I don't have to make a game of: she genuinely loves working in the kitchen.


These are just a few ideas, really. I'd love to hear yours in the comments!

Lesson for Mothers from Amy Carmichael

Such a beautiful quote it needs no commentary for me. Ponder it today as you deal with your precious children, mothers!

 "..she learned that duties do not clash any more than do the stars.  If we become inwardly rushed we shall feel as if they were all [the children in her care] demanding attention at once.  But if we are inwardly quiet we shall see the purposed sequence and take them one by one.  An angel is never sent on more than one errand at a time."

Quick, Easy, Healthy: Side Dishes

The best way to make sure a meal is quick, easy and healthy is to keep it simple. Many of you may think this is not a full meal, but our weekday meals are usually 1 protein (almost always meat), 1 starch, and 1 vegetable. I occasionally add bread or salad, depending on the meal. This makes things so easy because after I do the main dish, I usually just have to worry about a vegetable and one other side dish. Here are few quick favorites we enjoy:

Quick Carrots

 Roasted Asparagus

Cheddar Potato Strips

 Of course, there's the Oven Brown Rice I've already told you about. Baked Potatoes or Sweet Potatoes are good and quicker if you use the microwave. Sweet potatoes can even be substituted in the Cheddar Potato Strips recipe above, replacing the cheese and parsley with cinnamon.

What are your favorite quick side dishes?

Isn't It Cruel To Make Children Work?

Since our topic this week is, in fact, "Teaching Our Children to Work", the short answer to the title question would be no. However, if you're like me, you want to know why, so I will share why I think it is cruel to not make children work.

Before I start, just let me make it clear, that I'm not talking about breaking any child labor laws or sending your child out for paid employment at the age of 4. I mean basic chores around the house for the purpose of instructing your child for later in life when work will be a major part of his time investment and will be necessary for survival.

Here are a few myths and facts (all based on my own opinions, of course--feel free to take or leave them) about children and work:

Myth: My children will have their whole lives to work. I want them to enjoy their childhood.
Fact: If your child doesn't learn to work as a child, he will remain like a child when it is well past time for him to be working. And who said work can't be enjoyable?

Myth: Household chores are too difficult for my children to do.
Fact: Modified chores are perfectly attainable and even fun for children as young as 2.


Myth: I want my children to learn their own way to do chores when they are old enough to decide for themselves.
Fact: By that time they will be accustomed to the primary activity of being waited upon and will not wish to decide about anything concerning work.

Myth: Making my children work will take away from their play time.
Fact: If your children do nothing but make work; than you, the parent, will always be busy and there won't be anyone for them to play with.

Later this week, we'll explore some ways to make work fun and how to make those moments "teachable". For now, what are some myths you have heard about teaching children to work?

Links: Creating Welcoming Havens

The Atmosphere of Our Home @ A Simple Heart for Home

Making my Home a Haven @ Our Joyful Living

6 Steps to Easily Get Your Home Ready for Guests @ I Dream of Clean

The Most Important Thing About Making a Home @ Raising Homemakers

Get Organized to Welcome Unexpected Guests @ Life as Mom

Simple Woman's Daybook

For more Simple Woman's Daybook go here.

FOR TODAY: 

Outside my window...it's dark and late at night.

I am thinking...I'll be glad to get back to a normal schedule.

I am thankful for...cooperative kids today.

From the learning rooms...I'm chomping at the bit to get the new school books. The kids aren't quite as excited! Jessica has been avoiding her multiplication facts like the plague, so I got her a fun book about them at the library today. On the other hand, Jeffery has been studying the multiplication chart and making his sister mad by saying, "Hey, know what 10 x 10 is? 100!"

From the kitchen...doing an allergy free diet this week for myself. Interesting meals---everyone's been enjoying them.

I am wearing...a red shirt and navy flowered skirt.

I am creating...my grocery list for tomorrow.

I am going...shopping with my mom tomorrow!

I am reading...What's Eating Your Child? and still in the middle of Dwelling.

I am hoping...Joey sleeps through the night soon!

I am hearing...just the hum of the computer.

Around the house...seems like laundry has been backed up all week. Planning to finish it once and for all tomorrow--well as much as possible.

One of my favorite things...delicate tea cups.

A few plans for the rest of the week: shopping, appointments and maybe out to eat.

Here is picture for thought I am sharing...

My baby sister with Jerrod...missing her today on her birthday!

The Post that Should Have Been Welcoming Havens for Our Families

This is one of the posts a blogger struggles with---the one in which I show you a glimpse of real life. I desperately regret that this is the week that I decided to talk about welcoming havens and that this is the day that I talk about our homes being welcoming to our families. However, if you already have it all together, you don't need a post about how to welcome your family. And if you don't, join me, because maybe you need this more.

All too often, we save all the beautiful and delicious and comfortable for our guests and let our families fend for themselves. I've tried to analyze why we do this. Although it's hard to admit, I think sometimes we just don't want guests to see us as we really are, so we spruce up and exhaust ourselves cleaning so they think we are better than we are. While I think it's important to make guests feel comfortable and like we put forth effort for them, how do our families feel on a day-to-day basis?

It's so easy to spend hours on a perfect dinner for guests, but give leftovers to our spouse and children. It's so easy to clean up the "visible areas" of the house by dumping clutter and laundry on our beds, leaving the bedroom a mess for our husbands.

Enter the guilt. (Yes, it's resonating with me, too. How do you think I came up with the above description?)

As I sit here, at the computer (yes, I feel the irony!), there are toys strewn about the downstairs, the kitchen floor is a mess and I have a couple baskets of unfolded laundry beckoning me. It is also 11:00 P.M.--way past time for me to have all of that taken care of.

Now your feeling of guilt may be a little better, and mine is a little worse. My home is far from a welcoming haven right now.

As I see it, there are two things to do with guilt. One is to wallow in it and think about how horrible we are and just fall to the depths of despair (I've been there, I think.) The other thing is to acknowledge what you've done (or in this case, not done) and move on.

That's what I'm choosing to do: what I've done in the past when my home looks like this after an exhausting week.What does moving on look like?

Well, for me, tomorrow, I will do my best to:

• Spend time with the Lord to keep a sweet attitude, which is by far the best thing with which to welcome my family.
• Start with one thing. Probably the kitchen or the laundry. Dishes and clothes can quickly overwhelm me with six of us dressing and eating!
• Take some time to "be" with my kids instead of snapping at them to help all day.
• Work on my husband's priorities first.
• Have the downstairs reasonably clean and the bedroom free of laundry when my husband comes home from work along with the sweet attitude I mentioned above.

O.K. maybe my plan for right now should be to go to bed so I can make this place welcoming tomorrow! Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments--how do you make your home welcoming for your family?

Faith is a Free Fall

Photo Credit

I watched him as he hesitated, harnessed securely, at the top. He gripped the hand holds determinedly, then all at once and just as determinedly, he let go. I watched my husband voluntarily free fall through the air from 40 feet up, until the bungee cord caught him and he flew back up into the air. We were all relieved when he arrived back at our sides 10 minutes later, having lost nothing but the money it cost to fall through the air without killing himself.

Faith is a lot like that. We harness up and believe fully, at least as far as logic goes, that our "cord" is going to hold. Yet there is that moment when we hesitate at the top of a 40 foot---or maybe 4,000 foot---structure, because logic goes against jumping.

The hardest part is letting go, because when we do that we relinquish all control. We have to give ourselves over to the One Who is holding us.

Then comes the moment when we do fall and it seems like God is making a game of us as we bounce back and forth. Life does that. But when it comes down to the very end, we can all, without fail, say, "Faith is a free fall, but the anchor holds, I made it through intact, and my life is richer for having experienced the leap of faith."

Quick, Easy, Healthy: Kid Favorites Revisited

Is anyone else tired of restaurants assuming all children like is pizza, chicken nuggets, mac and cheese and cheeseburgers? O.K., maybe I'm alone on that one. (That's all right. I'm getting used to it.) I'm getting better at following recipes but still a novice at creating my own, so I'm going to point you to a few recipes that are healthier versions of the above "kid food". They also taste SO much better.

Instead of chicken nuggets, try this:
Garlic Lime Chicken (scroll down the page a little)
I promise, your kids will beg for this and they won't miss the breading at all! I use chicken strips to make it cook faster and sometimes just sprinkle the seasonings on instead of "dredging" and dirtying up additional dishes and counter space.

I told you about our main substitute for mac and cheese here, but if you want the real thing, this tastes awesome: (Hint: If your kids are used to the box with a K on it, add some orange food coloring. Unless of course, you like to see the real color of the food you eat.)
Creamy Mac and Cheese

There are many ways to do homemade pizza, but here is the fastest (and still pretty good!) I've come up with:
Homemade Pizza (in Less than 30 Minutes)
My adventurous little self actually made adaptations to this recipe. I poke the crust with a fork and pre-bake for 3 minutes before adding toppings, then I bake for 10 minutes at 500 degrees. For the sauce, I open an 8 oz. can of tomato sauce (1 per pizza), and stir into each can 1 tsp. each of garlic, oregano and basil as Anne recommends here. (I never seem to have the marjoram on hand, but I'm sure it's delicious, too!)

As for cheeseburgers, that's another one I usually hand to my husband because he makes delicious ones on the grill. We get grass-fed beef from a farmer each fall, so our beef is delicious (and cheaper, per pound, but this list isn't necessarily about frugal). Here are a few little tips to make our cheeseburgers restaurant-ish (but better!):

• Spread the inside of your hamburger buns with butter and grill before topping with burgers.
• Saute onions and mushrooms in butter until onions are transparent, spread bun with mayo and top with cheese and the onion mixture.
• Add a little Ranch dressing, cheddar cheese and bacon. (To keep this healthy, make your own dressing, get real cheddar cheese and nitrate-free bacon or turkey bacon if you like it.) 

Hint: If you have to unwrap your cheese from individual plastic, it's not really cheese.
Hint #2: If there is bacon in the house, I usually count it as the 20% unhealthy (see below) and let it go.

Yes, I am aware that I left hot dogs off of the list of generally-accepted-as-kid-foods in restaurants. I'm not sure that these qualify as food, but if you get unprocessed beef ones from a farmer, I guess they would qualify as healthy. I'm just a little wary of unknown animal parts in my food, but that's probably just me.

By now, you probably think I'm a total food snob. Not really. My kids go to restaurants and order off the kids' menu occasionally, and I don't say anything (except maybe gasping when I have to pay $5 for 1/4 of a box of mac and cheese). We eat at friends' and family's houses and campfires and picnics and I don't say anything. However, as a general rule, I try to keep our house 80% healthy, and hope that someday my kids are 100% thankful.

Creating Welcoming Havens for Your Big and Little Guests

**Special Thanks to Krista Hart for this guest post!**

I remember the days when my husband and I were first married and would happily invite guests into our home for a planned or impromptu time of fellowship.  It was quite the neat, orderly, and civilized affair.  There were no spills, nothing was broken, and there were no real messes to clean up besides a sink full of dishes.  Those were the days prior to children, when we entertained others without children. 

Three years into marriage, my husband and I quickly began to realize the need to change not only how we entertained in our home, but whom we entertained, as well.  Gathering with others took an abrupt shift as out of a desire for like-minded fellowship, we began inviting other families with young children into our home and I began to dabble in these things I was told were called playdates.  However, very quickly, I began to see that these affairs were no longer neat, orderly, or civilized!  While it was great to visit with others in our same stage of life, we rarely felt that we had truly visited.  Instead, we spent the majority of our time caring for babies or running after toddlers.  Not to mention, our home was usually left in a disarray with a distinctive Goldfish trail leading to the door! 

Not wanting to forsake these gatherings, but realizing how unproductive they often felt, I began to brainstorm on how I might make them go off more smoothly.  I am far from having perfected the art of hospitality, especially, when it comes to the unique challenge of entertaining little guests, but I have found some things that help these affairs go more smoothly.

1. Pray
Pray and ask God to bless your time together with your guests.  Talk to Him about any specific concerns you have about hosting or any needs that your guests might have.  You can pray for a peaceful time of fellowship, for good conversation, and for God's Spirit to be present in your fellowship.

2. Utilize baby gates & closed doors
This is especially helpful when you're having little guests in your home.  Small children are curious by nature and want to explore any new environment.  If you put up a baby gate to block an area that is off-limits, then it will alleviate any worry that a child might get into anything that would be unsafe for them.  Also, feel free to close doors to encourage guests to avoid certain rooms.  You may want to do this with your master bedroom or a room that is particularly messy! 

I like to put a baby gate at the bottom of our stairs to encourage everyone to stay on the same level.  This allows my upstairs to remain untouched if it is neat and orderly or unseen if it is in a disarray!  It also makes it possible for everyone to keep an eye on their little ones if everyone is on the same level.

3. Put away & bring out toys
Yes, this sounds contradictory, but it is a great way to minimize major messes or too much clean-up following a gathering.  First, put away toys with lots of small parts.  As much as your little one might want to play with their Lego micro-machines or Polly Pocket figurines with friends, little pieces have a tendency to end up everywhere or even lost.  Not to mention, if a mom is bringing a crawling baby, small pieces can be a real danger.  Second, put away toys that your children are particularly attached to in order to avoid fights.  Then, bring out a special box of toys just for your special occasion.  You can have your children help you decide what toys to put into this box, which also prepares them to receive guests with a an open heart and joyful spirit.

4. Make a treat to share
This is another area where you can involve your children.  The day prior or first thing that morning, prepare a special treat to share with your guests.  It can be as simple as break and bake cookies or as elaborate as a nice lunch.  I always keep three to four boxes of easy to prepare treats on hand for just this reason.  I like to keep an angel food cake mix and pair it with fresh fruit as well as a couple of different types of muffin mixes that I spice up by adding fresh fruit into the mix or citrus zest.  It is always great to offer coffee, tea, or some other fun beverage like homemade lemonade.

5. Relax and enjoy your guests
If you are relaxed in your home and have a welcoming nature, then your guests will feel relaxed and enjoy their time in your home. 

Remember, "Share with God’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality." --Romans 12:12-14  Your guests may not lack for food, clothing, or material possessions; but every person who enters your home is in need of encouragement, which can be found in the welcoming haven you create.

 Krista is mother of two preschool aged children and has just embarked upon the adventure of homeschooling.  She thoroughly enjoys the blessings of being a wife, mother, homemaker, and a new home educator.  Creating a peaceful, comfortable, clutter-free home for both her family and guests to enjoy is the aspect of homemaking that she delights in most. 

Links: Managing Ourselves Within Time

In General: 

Knowing When to Focus and When to Multitask and
Ways a To-Do List Will Help You Do More @ Productivity Your Way


and More Specifically:

RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD
Pound Cake and Praise @ Raising Homemakers

FOOD
Simple Ways to Eat at Home @ The Happy Housewife
7 Convenience Foods that are Easy (and Healthier) to Make Yourself @ Raise Healthy Eaters

RAIMENT
Fighting the Laundry Monster @ Organizing Your Way

SHELTER (Home)
5 Free Home Management and Productivity Tools @ The Mom Writes

LOVE
Wife and Mother: Power to Grow or Destroy @ Generation Cedar
 I'll be the One with Greasy Hair @ Lysa Terkeurst.com

SLEEP
5 Things That Makes Moms Tired @ Anne Elliott.com

Simple Woman's Daybook

For more Simple Woman's Daybook go here.

FOR TODAY: 

Outside my window...it's beautiful and sunny, but my computer thermometer is saying 87 degrees so I'm inside!

I am thinking...about recovering from a busy holiday weekend.

I am thankful for...peaceful, quiet, at-home days.

From the learning rooms...Joey is officially crawling, howbeit with his own unique style and Jerrod has made it about 24 hours with no sippy cup (it got lost somehow in our traveling). I'm really getting ready for school again, and hope to order books in the next week or so.

From the kitchen...I actually tried a baked potato bar last night. Nice and easy for a hot summer day. We added the first salad from our garden produce. Yum!

I am wearing...my at home outfit...an old jean skirt and a shirt that is not quite good enough to "go out" in.

I am creating...some new blog ideas....very beginning stages, though.

I am going...to church tonight.

I am reading...Blessing Your Husband by Debra Evans and Dwelling by Mary Beth Lagerborg.

I am hoping...for a good night's sleep tonight . It's been awhile!

I am hearing...Jerrod jabbering and Joey babbling as they play.

Around the house...I have things basically straightened, but everything needs a good scrubbing. I also have a few more loads of laundry to do today.

One of my favorite things...baby giggles and fresh food from the garden. (Oops! That's two!)

A few plans for the rest of the week: my annual eye appointment, a trip to the farmer to stock up on a few things and a church picnic.

Here is picture for thought I am sharing...

Guess who?

Should We Prioritize Our Time?

 If you didn't read yesterday's post, please read it first before you read today's post.

If we were organizing our day by priorities, we would make sure that God gets the most of our time, our husbands get the second biggest chunk, our children the third, and so on. However, think about how much time you spent in devotions today and how many hours were spent at a child's beck and call. Or even how many hours you spent on the job as compared to the time you saw your husband. I somehow don't think it is possible to keep our time in direct proportion to our priorities.


I see this most clearly in the life of the famed Proverbs 31 woman. If you see how many verses describe the time she actually spent on her children as opposed to how many verses describe the time she spent working or keeping her home, you might think her priorities were way out of order. However, her days overlapped so that she could focus on the important things and get done what God wanted her to get done. She managed herself well so she could streamline her day, or multi-task as we have come to know it.

Let's look again at the basic necessities we decided upon in the previous post, and see how they can fit into our priorities without going to extremes.

Relationship with God. I know what you're thinking. "How can anyone go to an extreme and spend too much time on their relationship with God?" I don't believe they can, if they have a proper perspective on what a relationship with God is. God is beside us, within us, constantly, if we are serving Him. Of course, we should spend time with Him alone with no other distractions, but we can "practice His presence" as the old classic tells us, all throughout our days. We also must realize that a relationship with God is independent of church and ministry activities. We can spend too much time on those things. Of course, completely disregarding God and seeing Him as a "Sunday morning" duty is the other extreme which, obviously, should be avoided.

Food. This is a necessity, of course, but most of us experience food as a luxury. We can certainly eat too much or spend too much time on an elaborate meal when a simple one would do. Of course, we can't ignore our need and that of our families for food, either.

Raiment. Having comfortable, appropriate clothing is a necessity--at least if you want to leave your house! However, keeping up with the latest fashions and trends is not. Only you and God know what a proper balance is for your life. We also don't need to spend an inordinate amount of time dressing and "decorating" ourselves. As a busy mom, I've given up more elaborate hairstyles and can now style my almost knee-length hair in 3 minutes. That gives me time to spend on more important things.

Shelter. We must have a home in which to live, which implies that we must work to buy one or pay the rent payment. In your home, perhaps your husband is the primary breadwinner, or you are, or you share the responsibility. That work must be done to meet the needs of the family. Sadly, I've seen large houses that must cost a lot of work hours to purchase and maintain that always seem to be empty. The people that work so long and hard to buy them are rarely there to enjoy the fruit of their labors. We must make sure that we have balance here as well.

Sleep. Rest is important, and one of the first things we omit or limit when we are pressed for time. This leaves us stressed and irritable and some experts even believe that not getting enough sleep can contribute to weight gain. (Who knew?) On the other hand, too much sleep can cause us to be lazy and unmotivated about the important things in our lives. Most adults, I'm told, need between 7-9 hours a night. We must do our best to get our rest, but some circumstances will prevent that perfect 7 hours you may need. When a child is sick through the night or a baby wakes you often, just give it to God and do your best.

Love. This is a tough one to quantify. Basically, although all we really need is God, the people in our lives are essential for a truly full and abundant life. If we neglect those close to us, we will certainly miss the best life has to offer us. Spend as much time as possible loving those in your home and in your family. They are gifts, and though in some cases, the days may be long, the years are indeed short.

Back to the Basics of Self

Bernice Wood of Living the Balanced Life , in a blog post here, made this quote:

We are all looking for that magic bullet, that great tip or technique that is going to finally help us get it ALL done, to actually manage our time. The thing is, we can’t really manage time. Time keeps on marching on, no matter what we do. What we are really looking to do is manage our self within our time.

 I've been mulling over that quote, and though I give credit to Bernice for giving me the idea, I will put my own unique spin on it as always.

Some have said that we always have time to do what God has planned for us to do that day. That means if we are perpetually "running out of time", there is something in our day that was not in God's will for us. Ouch!

Jesus set the perfect example for us throughout His life here on Earth. He managed Himself perfectly, therefore He fulfilled God's will perfectly. But what about the rest of us--the ones who are trying to follow after Jesus, but simply get bogged down with the chaos of our inward selves?

I think it's time to get back to the basics. Paul tells us in the Word that we should be content with food and raiment. Those are necessities, and we must manage ourselves well in those areas. In today's world and culture, shelter and love are also necessary for a fulfilled life. I would add a relationship with God and sleep. I think all of us, no matter our lifestyle (SAHM, working-outside-the-home mom, WAHM, single woman, or married without children), have these same basic things that we need to put into our schedules.

As with anything in life, there are extremes on both sides. We can excessively indulge in most of these areas or we can under-indulge to the point of making our life a drudgery rather than the abundant life God promises us.

Though I'm not an expert--just a learner, we will talk about each of these "necessities" in which to manage ourselves this week from both the excessive indulgence side and the other extreme as well.

Quick, Easy, Healthy: Breads

When I was growing up, a meal was never complete without some kind of bread. I've since learned that we consume way too many carbs, but it is still nice to know how to make bread for my family at least as an occasional treat. Homemade bread does not seem to fit into quick, easy or healthy; but here are a few recipes to try if you've been intimidated by bread as I once was:

If you have 3 hours and a bread machine:
Amish White Bread
Quick because your hands-on time is less than 30 minutes. Easy because all you have to do is put ingredients in the bread pan. Healthy because you can use whole wheat flour and cut out that long list of unpronounceables on the label of store-bought bread.

If you have an hour (or less):
40 Minute Rolls

If you have 20 minutes:
Fluffy Biscuit Muffins
Sweet Cornbread Muffins

Note: I love sourdough bread and tried it once, but I found that feeding anything other than myself, a husband and four kids is a bit too much at this point in my life.

Happy Independence Day!

Photo Credit

For my friends here in the United States, we are off celebrating our freedom today! May all of us follow the truth that sets us free, regardless of our nationality. Many blessings to you all!

Jennifer

Links: Finding Motivation

For Cleaning:
The Case for Once a Month Decluttering @ Steady Mom
Kids Can Have Fun Cleaning @ I Dream of Clean
Strategies for Staying Motivated While Uncluttering and Organizing @ unclutterer.com
Housekeeping Despite Lack of Motivation @ Legacy of Home

For Health:
Simple and Delightful Family Fitness @ Simple Kids
27 Awesome Apps for Healthy Foodies @ Eating Rules

For the Rest:
Feeling Unmotivated? 6 Ways to Get Recharged @ Ordinary Inspirations
5 Tips for Getting Motivated (When You'd Rather Just Lie on the Sofa) @ The Happiest Mom

Simple Woman's Daybook

FOR TODAY: 

Outside my window...the sun is shining brightly.

I am thinking...about a new month ahead.

I am thankful for...the beauty of grace and forgiveness.

From the learning rooms...we are just enjoying the classroom of life.

From the kitchen...I spent Saturday making jam and freezing and dehydrating strawberries. 

I am wearing...my comfy, purple robe. It's a lazy morning around here.

I am creating...a grocery plan for July.

I am going...nowhere but a quick errand today.

I am reading...about 4 books right now! I need to work on one at a time so I can actually finish some.

I am hoping...for a restful day to catch up on some housework.

I am hearing...Joey talking to himself in his bed and my other boys playing a game.

Around the house...I need to restock my cupboards with a grocery run, and laundry is beckoning.

One of my favorite things...a warm cup of coffee and my Bible on a quiet morning.

A few plans for the rest of the week: going away for the weekend to celebrate the holiday.

Here is picture for thought I am sharing...

When did he...

...become him?